Tips to Slay 2020 as a New Mom

Happy 2020 new moms! Congratulations on your bundle or bundles of joy! Being a mom is very new to me and something I will be adding to my platform as well. Even though we’re new to this, we already know being a mom is very challenging and sometimes we may lose our way. I also understand that we’re so caught up in caring for our little one that we may forget that we have a life. A couple weeks after Harper was born, I ¬†too, forgot I had my own life.

Now that we’re here, I wanted to share a few things you can do to get back on track and slay 2020 as a new mom. Please understand that all our time lines are different and we all have different, demanding little humans. Even if we adjust these tips to our lifestyle, I still believe we can prosper as new mothers!

Address your Postpartum Blues

Listen, postpartum is not a joke and should be addressed immediately. Sometimes you may not notice it, but those really close to you will and they may tell you. Don’t be quick to defend, but listen. I wrote about my time dealing with it so feel free to get some inspiration if you need here.

De-Clutter and Re-Organize

When I was pregnant, I threw so many things out, either donation or trash. I treated motherhood as a new chapter and I couldn’t be bogged down with “old things.” I gave away 85% of my wardrobe, got rid of things I haven’t used in at least 6 months and sought other things to the trash. My biggest reasoning behind this is because adding a new human in the home will yield extra human things, so it felt so good to get rid of old clutter. The air is clean and fresh, and your mind will be at ease.

Keep God first

Of course this is for my believers. God wants to be in everything you do. Take a load off and give him the heavy stuff. Actually, give Hi all the stuff. One of my biggest lessons in 2019 is giving up control. I only trusted myself to several things and it was severely exhausting. When I started to give up my control bits and pieces, I didn’t feel like I had to carry the weight of the world on my own shoulders. And you will need to do this as a new mommy.

Make Time for “You”

You are no good to other people, if you aren’t good to yourself. Although my husband and daughter are a priority in my life, I can’t give them my all without taking care of myself. So, slowly I started back doing the things I love to do; blogging, getting mani/pedis, going shopping, journaling, creating content for my blog, reading, watching my favorite movies/tv shows and anything else that peaked my interest. Whatever interests you that makes you feel good, continue to do. Sometimes, your day may not allow you to with a demanding little human and that’s okay. I love to read, so what I would do is read to Harper.

It’s okay to ask for Help

This was a hard pill to swallow for me. I never wanted help. I felt like I was Wonder Woman and that I can do everything by myself. After my c-section, I could not do anything but rest. There was no laundry, no cleaning, no cooking, nothing that took a lot of my energy. I was on bed rest and the only thing I could do, is feed my baby. I felt stupid asking my husband for a glass of water when I can just do it myself, limping and all. So understand, that it is okay to ask for help. If you’re having visitors, put them to work. If they love you, they will do it. Help can be in several different forms for each of us. I needed my husband dearly and a little ‘pick me up’ from my doctor so she prescribed me a low dosage of “help.” DO not be ashamed to ask for help.

Write down all your goals…even the crazy ones.

Make a vision board! Something bright and attractive! Write down ALL of your goals! How do you see yourself as a new mom? What ambitions do you have for your child/children? If you’re married, what goals do you have for your family? Write it all down. There’s nothing too hard for God. Make then attainable and start at a comfortable pace. I started this on my birthday and realized how excited I was that it is something to look forward to.

Good Luck Moms!

 

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Dress: Eloquii (old) Shoes: JustFab
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Earrings: Walmart, Bracelet: KateSpade

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Embracing the physical changes during pregnancy

One of the few things I thought about when I learned I was pregnant was the physical changes I would endure on this journey and I must say, I was looking forward to it! I was ready for whatever God was going to send my way. I still am even though I’m 23 weeks in. You’re probably wondering, “she’s crazy. Why would anyone look forward to that?”

My sister and I had a really interesting conversation about having children later on in life as opposed to be in our early 20’s. This isn’t something that she and I knew we couldn’t do. I wouldn’t have been able to appreciate every step if I were to have a child around that time. I also learned the older I am when I experience new things, I have a newfound appreciation for it, something I didn’t have when I was younger.

Here I am, in my early 30’s in a much more appreciative mindset. I cherish each growing day, including the body pains I endure. I tell my husband all the time, that going through different phases and experiencing new things allows me to reflect on how real God really is. To be able to create life (even though I’m a baby incubator lol) and watch that life grow is such a blessing. It pains me to see women who want to experience this, can’t.

So far in my experience levels, I noticed my nose getting wider and my lips getting more plump! As if it needs to get any plumper. My breasts has grown, and again, like it needs to get bigger, all pointed out by my sweet husband. My skin in certain areas are dryer than normal, but I have that “glow” that all mothers get. I always tell my husband to be honest about my appearance and let me know if he sees anything different. I’ve been blessed to still be able to wear my dresses. Of course all of my jeans and pants are folded away.

Comparison pic: 2018 vs. June 2019

I experience a lot “growing pains” which is basically my body adjusting and expanding for little one. I will say, sometimes the pain is very intense to where I am laying flat on my butt because the more I move, my body will lock up and cramp. This can annoy me because I love to move around and walk. I try to get some exercise in as much as I can. So far I haven’t gained any weight, seems like baby girl is eating everything I put in, but I definitely understand that I may gain all my weight closer to giving birth which I’m okay with.

Testing out new lip products that day, but no makeup. I don’t think I’ve ever looked this great without makeup.

It baffles me when people send me private messages telling me things are going to get worse as if its something to loathe. “yeah your feet will get swollen and you won’t be able to wear any of your shoes.” then there are comments such as, “just because you don’t have morning sickness now, you will get it later. You won’t look this put together in the next few weeks.”

“Get ready for a rude awakening.”

It was as if, pregnancy was something to hate. Don’t get me wrong, every journey is different and my journey can get very intense as the weeks pass by, but my goal is to embrace the journey and appreciate every step. I’ve read stories and talked to some moms about their journey and how difficult everything was but one thing I noticed about all of them, was the joy and appreciation they had and how they would do it all over if they can see the beautiful blessing at the end. So, if you’re a new mother to be like me, embrace the journey, the swollen lips, feet, body pain, etc. God chose us to be mothers for a reason. If you’ve yet to experience it, don’t worry, when its your time, God will look out.

My baby’s movements are everything. My husband and I love it.