My First Mother’s Day

Harper is almost 8 months and Mother’s Day has passed, but I’m glad I got this post out. Happy Mother’s Day to all your amazing mothers, I hope it was a blessed one. Happy Reading!

Wow. I never thought I’d see the day where I would become someone’s mother. It seems like it was just yesterday I was showing my husband the positive pregnancy test the day before Valentine’s Day. Here we are, with this little beautiful human being that I get to call my very own.

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She’s only 7 months, but she is the happiest baby I’ve seen in such a long time. She’s always smiling, no matter what time of day it is. She marches to the beat of her own drum. She’s on her own development timeline. One thing I learned early on, is to not compare her to any other baby or anyone else’s parental styles. She says “mama” so effortlessly and says “da-da” whenever she wants, not when you say. She’s crawling. Everywhere. Standing up on anything she can. She doesn’t like to be alone and she must be near mommy and daddy.  Sometimes, she’s in her own world and my husband and I will just look at her and say, “that little human is ours. She’s not going back to anyone. She’s here to stay. Our arms is where she likes to cuddle in.” I find myself looking at her older pictures (which I have coordinated by month) and just sit here in amazement that not long ago, I gave birth to a whole human.

I thought we had enough to time to baby proof our home but I blinked and she’s everywhere. My husband and I had so many plans to travel with her, show her what the world has to offer, but things have altered a little due to COVID-19, something that we will have to tell her years from now. Which reminds me; there are so many things that I have to teach her. I am her foundation in how she will navigate this world. Mother’s Day made me realize that I have a lot of work ahead of me.

To my Baby girl:

I knew you were coming. I dreamt of you during a time where being a mom was nonexistent. I never thought I would experience it because I didn’t think I’d be a good mother. You know, I didn’t have the best role model when it came to emulating a mother I aspired to be. Sadly, I don’t have those fairytale mother/daughter stories.

And then your dad and I found out we were having you. The anxiety! The expectations! I spent the next 9 months analyzing what kind of mother I wanted to be for you. You deserve those fairytale mother/daughter moments. You deserve my endless support as your mother. You deserve my guidance and friendship, and most importantly, my respect. You’re only 7 months but I call you the cutest baby everyday and will later translate to beautiful young lady, then young woman, as you get older.

I can’t wait for our girl talks, trips, outings, disagreements, you questioning my reasonings, conspiring with your dad to give us his credit card to go shopping and so much more. Our relationship will have challenges but it will be beautiful. I can’t wait to be the mom to you that I needed as a little girl. One of my main prayers is to be the most exceptional mother that God wants me to be.  I will lovingly embarrass you, vouch for you, brag on you, and be your biggest cheerleader. Do you like those homemade signs people make? Expect one at every graduation! And trust me when I say I have pictures of you for everything! Your father and I will do whatever we humanly can to provide you the life you deserve and where we lack, God will make up for it.

All My Love,

Mommy

NY&Co Partner #NYandcoCommunity

Ahhh my very first fashion collab! This is the beginning of many more!!

 

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Can’t wait to show “mommy legs” this spring and summer especially in this fun dress from the #KateHudson #happyxnature collection from @nyandcompany

 

 

Shop here and get $15 off your $30 or more purchase and share the link with a friend! Use the discount code NYCOFANS during checkout!

 

Chapter 34…Bloom

If I could title this next chapter of my life, I would definitely name it Bloom. It totally fits. For the past few years, I was just a small, tiny seed, trying to find my place in the world. Lost, needing a specific type of guidance to navigate this thing called life.

Around, 25 years old, God decided to step in and take charge, to work on me from the inside. He planted me in a place where He knew I hated. He would just talk to me. Sometimes I listened. Other times, I just let it go in one ear and out the other. But the whole time, His words became the soil I needed to grow. When my husband came into my life when I was 27, he became the water that helped God continue to make me grow. They became the friends I needed at the time and the more our relationship cultivated, the more I grew. God also allowed me to grow my relationship with others that I still rely on to this day. I grew and I grew…and then His light shined on me. Here I am, 7 years later…a flower that is ready to Bloom.

I could probably go into detail, because this wasn’t an easy process. I was dug up, pricked and pruned, surrounded by weeds and sometimes I had to go back into the ground, starting the process over. Then God would still water me, add more soil if needed.

I got to know me. What I like, what I don’t like. How I wanted to be treated and addressed. I can recognize toxicity real quick and immediately rebuke it. I’m learning to find my voice and speak up. Because let’s face it: my voice and feelings matter. Never let anyone tell you different. I know what makes me happy and I know what brings me joy. 7 years is a long time and I’m still going. The point is to keep evolving. I evolved so well I became a wife and mother, two things I never looked for or thought I’d have. But that’s what God does. He gives you what you need to be better. In your case, it may not be these things, but He will guide you to your purpose.

So, here I am at 34. With confidence I never knew I had. Back with strength I didn’t think I’d  obtain and a purpose ready to fulfill. Ready. To. Bloom.

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2020: Manifesting the Vision

Happy 2020 y’all! Now that the holidays are over and done with, its time to get down to the nitty gritty. It is time to decide what kind of year we want to have. Bringing in the new year gives you a chance to start fresh. Some people see it as a way to invite something new into their lives, a chance to be great. Its been a challenging last few years for my husband and I. We spent that time doing a lot of sowing and building a foundation. We were wronged on so many levels, were disappointed by a lot of people, struggled, but managed to come out on top. We celebrated our first year of marriage and welcomed our baby girl into our lives! We spent time cultivating our marriage and other friendships as well.

This year, we decided that we wanted to manifest everything we sowed in the last few years. A year of manifesting the vision that we prayed for. A year of “multiplied blessings.” We believe that this year is only the beginning for us and everything we prayed for will come to pass.

This year, we’re being very specific about what we want, but allowing God to still work His will, because let’s face it, He can do more that we ask or think. We’re spending the first few weeks of this month creating our vision boards, writing out our goals specifically (there’s that word again), praying over them as much as we can (because God never gets tired of hearing from us). He’s waiting on us to get serious and be truthful and concise about what we want because He can do it and then some.

Every year, our church has a “theme” for the new year and ours is 2020: Our Year of Multiplied Blessings. When I walked into church and saw this, I felt my spirit shift in excitement because it goes hand in hand with how my husband and I wanted our year to go. If you need a theme, feel free to take this, especially if you’re looking for God to truly bless your life this year.

After you’ve created your boards, and wrote everything down, believe that it is already done and that God has made a way for you.

“But as it is written, Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepare for then that love him.”

1 Corinthians 2:9

Happy 2020 guys. I can’t wait to see what God Does for you.

Follow me on IG here to share your amazing adventure!

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Dress: Lane Bryant/ Get it here

 

Tips to Slay 2020 as a New Mom

Happy 2020 new moms! Congratulations on your bundle or bundles of joy! Being a mom is very new to me and something I will be adding to my platform as well. Even though we’re new to this, we already know being a mom is very challenging and sometimes we may lose our way. I also understand that we’re so caught up in caring for our little one that we may forget that we have a life. A couple weeks after Harper was born, I  too, forgot I had my own life.

Now that we’re here, I wanted to share a few things you can do to get back on track and slay 2020 as a new mom. Please understand that all our time lines are different and we all have different, demanding little humans. Even if we adjust these tips to our lifestyle, I still believe we can prosper as new mothers!

Address your Postpartum Blues

Listen, postpartum is not a joke and should be addressed immediately. Sometimes you may not notice it, but those really close to you will and they may tell you. Don’t be quick to defend, but listen. I wrote about my time dealing with it so feel free to get some inspiration if you need here.

De-Clutter and Re-Organize

When I was pregnant, I threw so many things out, either donation or trash. I treated motherhood as a new chapter and I couldn’t be bogged down with “old things.” I gave away 85% of my wardrobe, got rid of things I haven’t used in at least 6 months and sought other things to the trash. My biggest reasoning behind this is because adding a new human in the home will yield extra human things, so it felt so good to get rid of old clutter. The air is clean and fresh, and your mind will be at ease.

Keep God first

Of course this is for my believers. God wants to be in everything you do. Take a load off and give him the heavy stuff. Actually, give Hi all the stuff. One of my biggest lessons in 2019 is giving up control. I only trusted myself to several things and it was severely exhausting. When I started to give up my control bits and pieces, I didn’t feel like I had to carry the weight of the world on my own shoulders. And you will need to do this as a new mommy.

Make Time for “You”

You are no good to other people, if you aren’t good to yourself. Although my husband and daughter are a priority in my life, I can’t give them my all without taking care of myself. So, slowly I started back doing the things I love to do; blogging, getting mani/pedis, going shopping, journaling, creating content for my blog, reading, watching my favorite movies/tv shows and anything else that peaked my interest. Whatever interests you that makes you feel good, continue to do. Sometimes, your day may not allow you to with a demanding little human and that’s okay. I love to read, so what I would do is read to Harper.

It’s okay to ask for Help

This was a hard pill to swallow for me. I never wanted help. I felt like I was Wonder Woman and that I can do everything by myself. After my c-section, I could not do anything but rest. There was no laundry, no cleaning, no cooking, nothing that took a lot of my energy. I was on bed rest and the only thing I could do, is feed my baby. I felt stupid asking my husband for a glass of water when I can just do it myself, limping and all. So understand, that it is okay to ask for help. If you’re having visitors, put them to work. If they love you, they will do it. Help can be in several different forms for each of us. I needed my husband dearly and a little ‘pick me up’ from my doctor so she prescribed me a low dosage of “help.” DO not be ashamed to ask for help.

Write down all your goals…even the crazy ones.

Make a vision board! Something bright and attractive! Write down ALL of your goals! How do you see yourself as a new mom? What ambitions do you have for your child/children? If you’re married, what goals do you have for your family? Write it all down. There’s nothing too hard for God. Make then attainable and start at a comfortable pace. I started this on my birthday and realized how excited I was that it is something to look forward to.

Good Luck Moms!

 

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Dress: Eloquii (old) Shoes: JustFab
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Earrings: Walmart, Bracelet: KateSpade

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